INTRO: Dm
[Dm]Jesus was a carpenter he died nailed to a wooden cross.
Irony oh [Am]irony upon [Bb]me it's never [Dm]lost.
[Dm]Gather 'round now people, I'm here to tell a tale
About a man who walks among you,[Am] a man you each know well.
My [Dm]name is Simon Keeper I had a wife and three grown kids,
A job in the towers [Am]cooking the books for the [Bb]shills that grease the [Dm]skids.
CHORUS:
[Dm]Irony oh irony, you are a [Am]bitter fruit to eat.
[Bb]Stripped of all your [C]beauty your [Dm]flesh is none too sweet.
VERSE:
[Dm]Now I ain't the most honest man that ever worked a skim.
I was caught with my hand in the cookie jar[Am] and brother that was it.
[Dm]Fifty-four and a big black mark upon my resume,
I found selling off [Am]what you don't own m[Bb]ight earn you the time of [Dm]day.
[Dm]Next it was a letter from my darling one,
"what's yours is mine, what's mine is mine",
[Am]Sealed with a hug and kiss.
[Dm]One by one my children closed their lives to me.
Lesson learned on [Am]Daddy's knee,
"give no [Bb]quarter to the [Dm]weak".
CHORUS:
[Dm]Irony oh irony, you are the [Am]polar seed of truth,
You [Bb]grow upon the [C]open plain the f[Dm]aithful you uproot.
VERSE:
[Dm]Kicked around 'bout a year living hand to mouth,
Then one day tryin' to bum a light[Am] I felt my will give out.
[Dm]Sat right down on the corner, started prayin' a little too loud.
Left my troubles [Am]far behind
When I [Bb]saw them emptying their pockets[Dm] out.
CHORUS:
[Dm]Irony oh irony, you are a [Am]treacherous son of a bitch,
[Bb]Pretending not to [C]care about the [Dm]heights you'll never reach.
VERSE:
[Dm]Now I won't start in preaching 'bout reaping what you sow,
This is the story of a half-hearted man,[Am] half honest as they go.
[Dm]But sit on down and rest a spell I've got another tale to tell.
About a lost young man in a [Am]far away land whose life is [Bb]just too easy to [Dm]sell
CHORUS:
[Dm]Jesus was a carpenter he died [Am]nailed to a wooden cross.
[Bb]Irony oh [C]irony upon [Dm]me it is never lost.
[Dm]Jesus was a carpenter he died nailed to a wooden cross.
Irony oh [Am]irony upon [Bb]me...[C]...it's never [Dm]lost.
[Dm]Jesus was a carpenter he died nailed to a wooden cross.
Irony oh [Am]irony upon [Bb]me it's never [Dm]lost.
[Dm]Gather 'round now people, I'm here to tell a tale
About a man who walks among you,[Am] a man you each know well.
My [Dm]name is Simon Keeper I had a wife and three grown kids,
A job in the towers [Am]cooking the books for the [Bb]shills that grease the [Dm]skids.
CHORUS:
[Dm]Irony oh irony, you are a [Am]bitter fruit to eat.
[Bb]Stripped of all your [C]beauty your [Dm]flesh is none too sweet.
VERSE:
[Dm]Now I ain't the most honest man that ever worked a skim.
I was caught with my hand in the cookie jar[Am] and brother that was it.
[Dm]Fifty-four and a big black mark upon my resume,
I found selling off [Am]what you don't own m[Bb]ight earn you the time of [Dm]day.
[Dm]Next it was a letter from my darling one,
"what's yours is mine, what's mine is mine",
[Am]Sealed with a hug and kiss.
[Dm]One by one my children closed their lives to me.
Lesson learned on [Am]Daddy's knee,
"give no [Bb]quarter to the [Dm]weak".
CHORUS:
[Dm]Irony oh irony, you are the [Am]polar seed of truth,
You [Bb]grow upon the [C]open plain the f[Dm]aithful you uproot.
VERSE:
[Dm]Kicked around 'bout a year living hand to mouth,
Then one day tryin' to bum a light[Am] I felt my will give out.
[Dm]Sat right down on the corner, started prayin' a little too loud.
Left my troubles [Am]far behind
When I [Bb]saw them emptying their pockets[Dm] out.
CHORUS:
[Dm]Irony oh irony, you are a [Am]treacherous son of a bitch,
[Bb]Pretending not to [C]care about the [Dm]heights you'll never reach.
VERSE:
[Dm]Now I won't start in preaching 'bout reaping what you sow,
This is the story of a half-hearted man,[Am] half honest as they go.
[Dm]But sit on down and rest a spell I've got another tale to tell.
About a lost young man in a [Am]far away land whose life is [Bb]just too easy to [Dm]sell
CHORUS:
[Dm]Jesus was a carpenter he died [Am]nailed to a wooden cross.
[Bb]Irony oh [C]irony upon [Dm]me it is never lost.
[Dm]Jesus was a carpenter he died nailed to a wooden cross.
Irony oh [Am]irony upon [Bb]me...[C]...it's never [Dm]lost.
