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5 years ago941Urge for Offal (2014)Half Man Half Biscuit

(intro) E G E G E G D E G E G E G D It was a [E]natural state of af[G]fairs; it was a [E]quiet ambition of [G]hers She had a [E]room overlooking the [G]lawn; it was a [E]perfect August [D]morn And with a [E]crossword clue in her [G]head, ?[E]Origin of Species? [G]read [E]?King James? under the [G]bed. [D]No broken bones, no gaping [C]wound...

5 years ago723Cammell Laird Social Club (2002)Half Man Half Biscuit

Well you say you[A] only watch documentaries[E] And that bad cold you've got - that's the [A]flu And that book that you foisted u[D]pon me [A]I'll never [E]read it, will [A]you? Did you [D]play in the Garden of [A]Eden? Were the [E]goalkeeper's gloves to you [A]tossed? 'Cos it [D]seems to me you're the [A]reason You're the reason why...

5 years ago641CSI:Ambleside (2008)Half Man Half Biscuit

Half Man Half Biscuit [C]I stick me big nose in When I go out Sealed-off car park [G]What's it all about? I like an altercation with a member of staff 'That was a ten poun[C]d note!' [C]I ring up Dial-A-Pizza I ring up Dial-A-P[G]izza [C]I ri[C7]ng up Dial-A-P[F]izza [G]And say that's not how I w[C]ould spell 'Hawaiian' [C]Facebook Mum Sea...

5 years ago753Back in the D.H.S.S. (1985)Half Man Half Biscuit

I was just sitti[E]ng there eating a salmonella sandwich When a [B7]man walked up to [E]me 'Would yo[B7]u mind, dear sir, if I asked you a question? If [E]music be the food of love are you the indigestion?' [B7]Oh-oh-oh-oh possibly [E]yes. [E]Found myself standing 'mongst a score or so of ageing grans and granddads When a [B7]frail voice asked...

5 years ago630Four Lads Who Shook the Wirral (1998)Half Man Half Biscuit

Psst, Sssh P[A]sst, Sssh[E][A][E] [A]Psst, Sssh [E] [A]Sssh.[E] They're [A]gonna be unveiling some new material Some[D] new material, some[A] new material And the drummer's got a song that he'd like to try out In a[D] live environment, a[A] live environment [E]Tell it down the mines, there's [D]gonna be a secret [A]gig You've gotta [E]knock...

5 years ago637Urge for Offal (2014)Half Man Half Biscuit

Stuck up a hornb[C]eam, mind like a thickening fog [F]Stuck up a hornbeam, mind like a thickening [C]fog [G]Gonna get discovered by a [F]bloke out walking the [C]dog.[G] [C]I'm so desolate, I'm so all alone I [F]feel arthritic in every single [C]bone [G]I've got a mynah bird[F] that does nothing but [C]moan.[G] For [C]you I'd lose my self...

5 years ago711Urge for Offal (2014)Half Man Half Biscuit

(intro) A D D A D A [D]'Come now, Vince' she said, 'we can[A]'t continue in this way [D]Seems to me there's something on you[A]r mind. Should [D]I accept a ride in a tiny [A]craft about your head [D]Tell me, Vince, the truth what would I [A]find?' [G]Horse-drawn yawns upon the driveway, [D]Victory V ice cream in stock [C]Eintracht Oblong,[G]...

5 years ago880Back in the D.H.S.S. (1985),Back in the D.H.S.S. / The Trumpton Riots E.P. (1988)Half Man Half Biscuit

C G, C G [C]Everybody's doing the Len [G]Ganley Stance [C]Everybody's doing the Len [G]Ganley Stance [C]Everybody's doing the Len [G]Ganley Stance [C]Everybody's doing the Len [G]Ganley Stance [C]Everybody's doing the Len [G]Ganley Stance [C]Everybody's doing the Len [G]Ganley Stance [C]Everybody's doing the Len [G]Ganley Stance [C]Everybody's...

5 years ago673Trouble Over Bridgwater (2000)Half Man Half Biscuit

I got three from[G] each section on the fixed odds coupon But I [D7]still don't want to go to [G]Cuba, 'Cos [C]Cuba's the [D7]new desti[G]nation; [C]Cuba's the [D7]new [G]Iceland And it'll [C]be full of [D7]Italia Conti [G]rejects, so [C]no; I [D7]don't want to go to [G]Cuba, I'd [C]much rather [D7]go down to [G]Dorset With its [A]wonderful...

5 years ago717This Leaden Pall (1993)Half Man Half Biscuit

(intro) F C (x4) It's th[F]e year 2[C]163 Chester [F]Barnes is risen from the [C]dead And he'[F]s coming round to creosote th[C]e fence And [F]I for one feel Spartan and mon[C]astic. As the [F]drama unfolds on the [C]lawn There's [F]a wager between the staff an[C]d me That [F]Barnsey can't complete the job [C]before I [F]take my final Stannah...